Death always comes as a surprise. It snatches life without notice. Everybody knows its occurrence but not everyone approaches it with such a cheerful attitude. Ask any person on how he views death and most probably you’ll get a common answer that death has a positive form but negative meaning. However, for me, death has a positive form and positive meaning. Natural human experience shows that losing the spatio-temporal existence of somebody whom you care, admire, and love surely brings a gloomy atmosphere.
I would say that I’m lucky because I was born with all my grandparents alive, I had a little of both worlds. All of them saw me grow, and I was special to them. During my developmental years, they influenced me and indirectly taught me to think for myself but they did not in anyway taught me to be brat. I learned about their lives through their stories. I was never deprived to listen to their experiences which helped me to know them better. It may be the case that I don’t know them exactly but at least I know them by what they showed and told me. Whenever I was with them, I can let my guards down, act like a child but see the world through grown-up eyes.
My mother’s father whom we call Papa kicked the bucket ahead of my other grandparents. He was the man who taught me what real courage is by simply allowing me to ride a horse at a very young age. He has this unique way of letting me sleep – by letting me hear his earsplitting snore. Losing him was extremely painful but there was no remorse.
Nanay, who is my father’s mother meet her Maker during the celebration of Philippine Centennial. She was very humble and affectionate. “Learn to be patient,” she used to say. She taught that lesson well. I can vividly remember the weekends at their house. One time while sitting on her lap, she said that I’ll have mustache. She was right but partly wrong; she did not tell me that I’ll have a sparse mustache.
Yesterday, my younger sister sent a text telling me that Tatay (my dad’s father) expired. It’s sad losing him. He is almost 80 but his eyes did not go bad. He can read the Bible without eye-glasses. Through his stories, I learned how he struggled to get an education. He was not a scholar but he writes very well. His drafts expressed what he wanted to say. Sadly, those drafts were never published. One time, he asked me to prepare a family-tree which I started while in high school but I never had the chance to finish it. He wanted to connect with the people whom he considers part of his family.
Losing my three grandparents somehow taught me to approach death with a different attitude.
When I started blogging this year, it crossed my mind to blog about how I want my own funeral to happen. Not that I want to die but my life experiences prepared me to approach death not with sadness but with immeasurable thanks to God. For me, planning about one’s funeral is exactly the same as planning about one’s graduation, marriage, promotion, birthday, and other momentous occasions. After all, it’s not about our will but it’s His will; hence, we always say: Let Thy will be done. It’s just that our culture has a negative sentiment about dying.
It came to a point wherein dying for me is such a blissful event primarily because I’ll be meeting God. Nothing can be greater than to live life with the Maker. In His land, I’ll have no memories of my earthly life; otherwise, such memories will make me sad. Personally, I believe that sadness does not exist in Heaven. Not that I don’t want to remember my loved ones but the feeling of losing sad memories on earth is something which for me is truly liberating. It’s like a memory stick being reformatted which immediately utters: Hooray, no file exists here!
I want my funeral to display a positive attitude towards death. I want tears of happiness not of sadness. I want people to realize that earthly death is the only key to live with God.
Today, I know that Tatay joined his Creator not with a heavy heart but with a joy in his heart because he kept a good relationship with God during his waking days.
Whatever His plan for Tatay, I want Him to let it happen. I completely surrender Tatay to God.
Lord, let Your will be done.
I would say that I’m lucky because I was born with all my grandparents alive, I had a little of both worlds. All of them saw me grow, and I was special to them. During my developmental years, they influenced me and indirectly taught me to think for myself but they did not in anyway taught me to be brat. I learned about their lives through their stories. I was never deprived to listen to their experiences which helped me to know them better. It may be the case that I don’t know them exactly but at least I know them by what they showed and told me. Whenever I was with them, I can let my guards down, act like a child but see the world through grown-up eyes.
My mother’s father whom we call Papa kicked the bucket ahead of my other grandparents. He was the man who taught me what real courage is by simply allowing me to ride a horse at a very young age. He has this unique way of letting me sleep – by letting me hear his earsplitting snore. Losing him was extremely painful but there was no remorse.
Nanay, who is my father’s mother meet her Maker during the celebration of Philippine Centennial. She was very humble and affectionate. “Learn to be patient,” she used to say. She taught that lesson well. I can vividly remember the weekends at their house. One time while sitting on her lap, she said that I’ll have mustache. She was right but partly wrong; she did not tell me that I’ll have a sparse mustache.
Yesterday, my younger sister sent a text telling me that Tatay (my dad’s father) expired. It’s sad losing him. He is almost 80 but his eyes did not go bad. He can read the Bible without eye-glasses. Through his stories, I learned how he struggled to get an education. He was not a scholar but he writes very well. His drafts expressed what he wanted to say. Sadly, those drafts were never published. One time, he asked me to prepare a family-tree which I started while in high school but I never had the chance to finish it. He wanted to connect with the people whom he considers part of his family.
Losing my three grandparents somehow taught me to approach death with a different attitude.
When I started blogging this year, it crossed my mind to blog about how I want my own funeral to happen. Not that I want to die but my life experiences prepared me to approach death not with sadness but with immeasurable thanks to God. For me, planning about one’s funeral is exactly the same as planning about one’s graduation, marriage, promotion, birthday, and other momentous occasions. After all, it’s not about our will but it’s His will; hence, we always say: Let Thy will be done. It’s just that our culture has a negative sentiment about dying.
It came to a point wherein dying for me is such a blissful event primarily because I’ll be meeting God. Nothing can be greater than to live life with the Maker. In His land, I’ll have no memories of my earthly life; otherwise, such memories will make me sad. Personally, I believe that sadness does not exist in Heaven. Not that I don’t want to remember my loved ones but the feeling of losing sad memories on earth is something which for me is truly liberating. It’s like a memory stick being reformatted which immediately utters: Hooray, no file exists here!
I want my funeral to display a positive attitude towards death. I want tears of happiness not of sadness. I want people to realize that earthly death is the only key to live with God.
Today, I know that Tatay joined his Creator not with a heavy heart but with a joy in his heart because he kept a good relationship with God during his waking days.
Whatever His plan for Tatay, I want Him to let it happen. I completely surrender Tatay to God.
Lord, let Your will be done.
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